Kal Otis

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Learning Style and Communication

June 21, 2017 by Kal Otis in Learning Styles

My passion as a pastor, leader and counselor is to equip those whom I serve to be the best they can be. One thing I’ve come to realize over the years is that an effective communicator excels at every part of life. And communication is impacted by many factors; personalities, experiences, the way we were raised, learning styles, along with other influences. My next few posts will be related to this idea of understanding communication through Learning Styles. This post will focus strictly on what learning styles are, and why they are important to effective communication. The three posts following this will drill into how to utilize the knowledge and understanding of learning styles in our marriages, our parenting, and lastly, with our volunteer teams in ministry.

There’s more to the art of communication than the use of words. It’s the exchange of information and how it connects us to people. We live life trusting and relying on the sensory cues we receive from our eyes, ears, mouth, nose and touch. Hence the tones and body language that accompany spoken words influence how communication is received. So many factors influence how we deliver and interpret communication. One of those factors is our own unique learning style. The three identified learning styles are: Visual, Auditory and Kinesthetic. Understanding our own unique VAK learning style can not only help us become better communicators, but also enhance how we learn, work and relate to others. Once understood, our learning style can be used as a tool to save us time and reduce frustration. I’ve seen firsthand as a counselor how it promotes healing, understanding and purpose.

The VAK model is popular because it’s intuitive and simple to use.

What is a learning style?

Learning styles refer to a person’s preferred way to take in, process, understand and remember information. Psychologists developed this learning style model in the 1920s. The VAK learning style uses the three main sensory receivers: visual, auditory and kinesthetic (movement) to determine the dominant learning style. Everyone uses all three styles as they process and learn. However, according to the theory, a person will have a strong preference toward one or two dominant styles.

Auditory Learners: Tend to:

  • Enjoy listening but can’t wait to talk. Talk to themselves a lot. Move their lips while reading as well as read out loud.
  • Learn best when they hear their own voice. This is why they vocalize in the middle of a class, meeting or movie.
  • Struggle with reading and writing tasks.
  • Remember names, but not the face or appearance of someone they just met.
  • Talk ‘a mile a minute’ and expect others to drop everything to make eye contact to listen to them.
  • Sounds distract them.
  • Interpret the underlying meanings of speech through listening to tone of voice, pitch, speed and other nuances. A raised voice might be an argument to them, but just ‘a discussion’ to those with a different style.
  • Sometimes remember things by setting information to a tune or rhyme.
  • You’ll catch them saying, “I hear what you’re saying, please describe it in more detail”.

Visual Learners: There are two kinds of visual learners.

  • Visual – linguistic learners tend to:
    • Learn through written language such as reading and writing.
    • More likely to remember tasks if they write them down, even if they don’t go back to read them again.
  • Visual -Spatial learners tend to:
    •  Have difficulty with written language and do better with diagrams, demonstrations, videos, maps, colorful charts and visual aids.
    • A VS tends to gaze into ‘space’ in the middle of a conversation (much to a spouse’s or a teacher’s dismay) to ‘picture’ what is being said (this can appear disrespectful to other learning styles).
    • Find it easy to visualize faces and places.
    • Recall conversations based on where it happened.
    • Easily distracted.
    • Often choose to sit in the front of the class room
    •  They will comment, “I see what you’re saying”, “it’s clear cut”, “in light of”.

Kinesthetic Learners: Tend to:

  • Learn by being involved, touching and/or moving.
  • Remember what was done rather then what was said or seen.
  • Have to move in order to concentrate.
  • Easily distracted during a visual or auditory presentation. Will take notes so they can move their hands.
  • Need to know the big picture first before getting the details.
  • Having the space to draw pictures, doodle, shake their leg, chew gum and fidget while you communicate helps them hear and learn more effectively.
  • Use gestures when speaking and stand close when speaking or listening.
  • Often they are poor spellers and will write words to determine if they "feel" right.
  • Tend to drive visual learners crazy with their constant movement.
  • Attack problems and express frustration physically – they’re your door slammers and fist pounders.
  • This group will say, “I’ve got a feeling about what you’re saying”, “come to grips with”.

You may see yourself and others you know exhibiting all three styles. This isn’t unusual. However, we all have a strong preference for one or two. The best way to discover your learning style is to take a test. (Your highest score is your dominant style. Your second score supports your dominant style). Once you became a student of the order of your style preferences, you’ll view people and communication differently. I found I was able to understand my responses, improve my ability to learn as well as my kids’, offer more grace, save time and be more effective at leading teams.

My next bog will focus on how to improve our marriages by understanding our learning style, and our spouses style.

June 21, 2017 /Kal Otis
Learning styles, communication, learning, marriages, parenting, volunteers, VAK learning styles, Auditory, Visual, Kinesthetic
Learning Styles

Practical Tips to Deal with Separation Anxiety

May 22, 2017 by Chad Gilchrist in Brain Development

I've lost count of the number of times I've been greeted by blood curdling cries in the church hallways as over fatigued moms attempt to drop their babies off in the nursery.  Volunteers are eagerly waiting to shower love, care and patience on each baby so moms can catch a much needed break. They use every familiar skill in their arsenal to hush and soothe, only to discover the tears of “separation anxiety” rage on.

At about six months, babies develop representational thinking, which means they can picture objects and people in their mind. They days of “out of sight, out of mind” are gone. When a parent or familiar person “disappears” from a baby’s sight, it produces separation anxiety in them.

One way to help alleviate this is to take the time to share with parents what their child is experiencing as well as find ways to earn the trust of both parent and baby during this 'trust versus mistrust' phase. This is the first stage of Erik Erikson's theory of psychosocial development and it happens between birth and approximately 18 months of age. According to Erikson, trust versus mistrust is the most important timeframe in a person's life. The quality and quantity of care that babies receive during this stage from their primary caregivers influences their ability to trust others later on in life. Success during this phase leads to hope.

I firmly believe that nursery staff and volunteers are 'foundation builders', not baby sitters! They give each baby they warmly hold, cuddle, feed and change, their first glimpse of their Heavenly Father! So over-staff your nursery with baby lovers and work with each parent to ease anxiety in them and their baby. 

  • Greet parents and babies warmly. Shower love on both parents and babies to ease anxiety. Greet and talk directly to each baby (even if he or she is crying) and parent as they arrive. 
  • Help parents to establish a special good-bye routine. Often parents try to sneak out while their baby is being distracted. Sneaking out may save the parent from hearing their baby cry but it increases separation anxiety. They need the comfort of a familiar good-bye routine. A high-five, tickle, flying kisses, a hug or a familiar phrase are ways parents can establish a routine. Discourage prolonging them leaving, and stay calm.
  • Create a story flip book for each baby. Ask parents to bring photographs of the baby, parents, siblings, pet and favorite objects. Include captions with each picture that say, “God made (name of the baby), God made mommy and daddy, God loves (name of the baby), God made (sibling names), (name of baby) loves to play with (favorite object).” Use it as a storybook. This can be a great source of comfort.
  • Establish a consistent nursery routine and schedule. Fight separation anxiety through predictability. Prepare them with transitions as you move from Bible songs, to story time, to snack time and playtime.
  • Allow babies to have their security object. Familiarity breeds security. You can help reduce separation anxiety by allowing them the comfort of their blanket or a stuffed animal.
  • Rock, pray and sing to the babies as you hold them. Hold and talk to the baby so they learn to trust your touch and voice. It will become a source of comfort over time. 
  • Ask parents to attend regularly during the separation anxiety stage.  A consistent routine affords babies to feel safe and secure in familiar surroundings. Ask the parents how long they are comfortable allowing their baby to cry before they should be notified. 

 

Photo by Annie Theby on Unsplash


 

 

May 22, 2017 /Chad Gilchrist
separation anxiety, anxiety, babies, helping parents, Trust versus Mistrust, Erik Erikson
Brain Development
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